yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
