shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
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