We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
well most of my day revolves around power hour
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
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