THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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