so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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