So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
