Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
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