She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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