I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
