Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
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