Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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