You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Randomize
