And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
