Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
