i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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