They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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