M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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