Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.