Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
21 Guys Share Their Insane Stripper Stories
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
27 Reasons Why Men Need To Moan More During Sex
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.