dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
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Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
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Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
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