Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
