youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize