Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
