I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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