i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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