If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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