Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
