I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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