you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
