I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
