new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
