Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
