Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
He's on the porch naked. Help.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize
