Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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