WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
being pregnant is like rehab
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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