You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize