To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
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