She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
