She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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