It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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