I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
