Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
