You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
17 year olds will be the death of me.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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