gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Randomize