it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Randomize
