I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
