What did we do last night that was yellow?
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
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