all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
