I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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