thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
