Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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